09/01/2023

merry new years to all who celebrate

i guess you could say i havent showered in a year

i hate wip hell! i hate wip hell!

was really hoping to have something to show for the new year but NOT REALLY. i was accepted into a zine but then got dumped out which was a Fun And Swell Time so i cant post any of that here, i wrote an alright final chapter of the ultrakill fic but thats not really enough to put as The New Years Update, ive had a lot of good beginnings of stuff but no good middles or endings (or even any middles or endings at all), just in general having a shit time of it. its whatever though, ill get into the groove later, for now though the next couple days im gonna be trying to get some little new things on the site and also im gonna be on neocities again woohoo

i miss yaoi christmas already
24/12/2022

mary chrimbo

happy christmas to everyone who does that, and happy holidays to everyone else. i hope you all have a great rest of the year, and a happy new year.

site status update

im still alive and feeling better now but also taking a break for christmas. got some new stuff on AO3 and will continue to update there, but site's not gonna be updated until the new year or thereabouts. sorry :(
13/12/2022

everyone has covid except me

yeah. it seems like everyone in my family is getting covid except me. and on the one hand god damn does it feel good to be vindicated by the evidence that actually i wasnt being paranoid by still masking and social distancing and all that but at the same time *my entire family has covid*. i've been busy all week just keeping the house working, i've had to postpone my exams because theres no way i can do them in these conditions, and its fucking freezing in here cause we need to keep the windows open for ventilation and shit. it sucks here and im very tired. and just because i dont have covid doesnt mean im not ill for the record. i have a really bad cold and while its not nearly as bad as covid im still not operating anywhere near 100% even disregarding all of the circumstances.

the dwarf fortress steam release is pretty good though so you know its not all bad
03/12/2022

i am going insane

why is everyone fucking posting ai art everywhere why does nobody see why does nobody understand why dont they fucking understand cant they fucking see its not hard to see how can they not understand any of this why are they all just fucking worshipping it what is their fucking problem why are they so fucking blind to it its really simple to understand and yet theyre just fucking posting it all the fucking time like "haha funny" clueless to the pretty fucking obvious connotations for actual artists' jobs this holds and they dont care one fucking bit what the fuck like theres no way theyre that stupid by accident they have to be doing it on purpose what the fuck


i am having a mental breakdown by the way B)
25/11/2022
i've been taking my adhd meds (concerta/ritalin) for a few days now and god damn!!! they're good!!!!

the first thing i did was write 5000 words of homestuck fanfic in 6 hours which was Not Great so ive been recovering for the last few days but now im back in business baby this shits awesome. now my writer's block is due to lack of ideas, not lack of ability! it has made me a bit more impulsive and scatterbrained but thats just the price we pay.

also i probably have ocd
21/11/2022

what's the deallllll with the new pokemon gameeeee?


yeah its not good.

but the thing is, it has it's moments of brilliance. every pokemon game does! the game boy games were fucking good, the DS games are peak pokemon and honestly close to peak gaming, the 3DS games are fine but loose around the seams, and the switch games are just totally fucking busted with moments of excellence.

it's just that more and more gamefreak is having to fight against the crunch being imposed ever tighter upon them, on hardware they're less and less familiar with, and more and more complex games.

it sucks, you know? the pokemon games could be great, and the devs are clearly putting a lot of passion into them, it's just the games need at least three times more devtime than they're given, and nobody wins because of this.

except the CEOs. the CEOs always win. :(
20/11/2022
i've been reading through shinto-religion.neocities and their tumblr recently (very good site and blog btw even if the site is still majorly under construction), and like. god damn. i never really thought about it before but like holy shit once you look for it theres so much orientalism fucking everywhere on here and the wider internet. like you dont't really notice just how much people slap torii on shit for no reason (in large part because im pretty sure most people reading this dont know what a torii is other than "that one kind of japanese gate" and tbf i didnt know either until yesterday) but it's really weird once your notice it.

and that's just one example! this shits everywhere! it is pretty fucking weird how we make japanese schoolgirl uniform a sex thing! it is questionable how many people just slap random japanese on their shit (looking at you porter robinson)!

i mean shit! this blog layout just has some random fucking anime on it!!! it doesn't need it!!!!! i didn't put it there!!!!!! the premade html just... had it!!!!!

shits fucked
21/10/2022
kept you waiting, huh?

anyways, ive learned by now its a BAD idea to promise updates are coming soon because they never are, but im still around. life has been incredibly miserable as of late and ive lacked the spark to really be a webmaster and etc, but it is what it is. new writing index is at least layout complete, but i hate all the colours and also cant think of any better colours :(. i mean ideally thered be fancy art but i cant even write lmao no way i can draw.

also lol ive been hemorrhaging followers. understandable cause of all the breakdowns but still lol.

go listen to antonymph its good. it also has a siiva rip which im pretty sure is canon toby fox rip cause hes in the unironic credits.

see you in another 10 years
23/09/2022
games aren't fun anymore, especially multiplayer games. single player indies still have a chance, but the rest went to shit a long time ago. every game is a service, every transaction is micro, every loot drop is a lootcrate, everything's a battle pass, everything's a crossover, nothing is just a fucking game anymore.

sea of thieves

i loved sea of thieves, man. incredible game. common rareware W.

and then after 2 years of smooth sailing (no pun intended), it all went to shit. battle pass! real money shop! pirates of the carribean crossover! no longer was the game sea of thieves, it was a pirates of the carribean ad and skinner box masquerading as a game nobody will ever be able to play again. this is far from a rare occurence.

warframe

warframe is a unique case. it's always had a questionable cash shop system, but at the same time it's also historically been one of the most f2p friendly games out there. and for what it's worth, what remains of warframe still is very f2p friendly.
unfortunately, DE (the devs) seems determined to get rid of all the good parts.
i'm too tired to rant about railjack again, but the TL;DR is this:
-Railjack was a truly cooperative mode, a first for warframe. While warframe has historically been a co-op shooter, this is the first mode where if you aren't working with your team you're gonna lose.
-While rough around the edges, it's nonetheless very fun and rewarding.
-About a year after release, DE releases corpusjack.
-Corpusjack totally fucks the balancing, fucks the rewards, ruins the coop, and generally fucks it all up.

it's not just corpusjack either. it's everything. scarlet spear was bad, new war (the culmination to EIGHT YEARS OF PLOT) came out half-baked, the new eximus and operator reworks have just made the game more painful to play, it's all just a fucking mess.

splatoon 3

:(


sorry for another rant, theres some more i want to talk about but im too tired to.
22/09/2022

maybe the luddites had a point actually

AI art fucking terrifies me. as a self proclaimed Artist myself, and as someone who's friend group is 90% actual artists, this shit's fucked man. For years everyone's been saying that creativity is the one thing AI will never be able to replicate, it'll only be manual labour, all that shit.

and yet. here we are.

i mean if we didnt live in a fucking capitalist society then it'd be fine, but the fact of the matter is we do and so basically until we reach FULLY AUTOMATIC LUXURY GAY SPACE COMMUNISM the arts are gonna be fucked to hell and thats gonna fucking suck.

for the record im not talking about dall-e mini and it's ilk, im talking dall-e 2 and stuff in a similar league to it quality wise.

sorry for rant
16/09/2022
20,000 views! Fuck yeah! And 60 followers!

sorry for not updating the site at all recently (or writing anything), i promise i'm still alive. splatoon 3 has activated my ultimate autism technique: hyperfixation overdrive and i've also been kind of unmotivated in general, but i'll try to crank something other than a blog post out soon-ish.

thank you for all for looking at my site though. i appreciate it.
08/09/2022

WE LIVE IN A SOCIETY


god i hate capitalism. youre all smart so you understand why but. GOD. every so often i lose the mental energy to pretend i dont hate it here and it just fucking sucks. i'm comically unemployable, live on the poverty line, and england is in like five recessions at once right now. im so fucked.

we have to reach a breaking point soon, right? things can't just keep getting worse forever? eventually everyone else will stop being stupid?

by the way, can i just say how much i HATE people who call for a "return of the middle class" like FUCK YOU. for a middle class to exist, there must be a class below it and above it. otherwise it's not the middle class. none of them want to improve the system in any way, they simply wish to retake their position of privilege within it. and they position themselves as allies of the working class, like they're in the fight with us. they're honestly worse than the actual ruling class, cause at least the ruling class is plainfaced evil and doesnt pretend otherwise.

BOTTOM TEXT

05/09/2022
i've been deepdiving geocities archives, and wow. the whole place is just so... sad. i talked about a similar kind of thing in shortform blog entry 07/11/21 16:06 (but far worse cause it was a year ago), but like. these places were populated once. people updated their sites, talked to other people, roleplayed, blogged about things, put their heart and soul into this, and now all that's left of geocities is a ghost town.

will we even get to be a ghost town, or will we be totally forgotten?

*segue into semi-related thought*

neocities is great, i'm happy to be here, but it's missing a certain je ne sais quoi of sincere naivety, you know? we're counter culture, we know what we're doing here and why we're doing it, and in some ways we're defined more by what we aren't than what we are. like, we aren't The Soulless Social Media Web, and that's great, but what are we? geocities wasn't defined by it's opposition to anything, it simply was, and the sites simply were. and while undoubtedly almost every site on neocities is trying to simply be, all of them are underscored by the fact that simply being is an act of rebellion against the current status quo.
28/08/2022 followup
didn't expect to be back so soon, but here we are.

i looked more into the drama. yeah i changed my mind everyone was pretty much equally wrong and dumb

if im actually the wrong and dumb one here please let me know, i only have third hand information on all this shit
28/08/2022

SPLATOON 3 TESTFIRE

the splatoon 3 testfire was fucking awesome. the new weapons are awesome, the new maps are awesome, tricolor battles are surprisingly balanced, everything looks awesome.

which is why i'm worried nintendo's gonna fuck it all up.

i mean, catalogs are still a thing they won't elaborate on. the game's still rated for microtransactions. servers are still janky. it's all just... guh.

enough about that though, thoughts about the good stuff:
the tacticooler is rad as hell. i'm a support main in all games that let you do that, and finally being able to erect a dispenser in splatoon is awesome (and on the n-zap, most based weapon ever!!). i need to get better at positioning it, but that'll come with time.
the new lobby is awesome, i love the hologram effect on other players, and them actually being 2d. it's both a really clever resource saving thing, and also just looks really cool.
i got to clout 300k and paper ruler, which was awesome.

OTHER STUFF

sorry for only writing shitty ironic x reader stuff the past few days. i don't plan to stop, but i'm still sorry. i'm gonna try and make the panchiko shrine too (unless anyone has another one they want me to make first) so you can see me write about a band you dont care about instead of a game you dont care about.

that whole drama a few days ago was really fucked tbh. like one side (proship) was absolutely in the wrong but on the whole everyone just seemed to be handling everything in the dumbest stupidest way possible. but maybe i just lack the critical information.

that's pretty much all i have to say for now
19/08/2022
i've been thinking more about splatoon 3, and honestly i'm kind of worried about the catalog system. i am the #1 battle pass despiser in the world and if they put anything like that in then im gonna be SO PISSED. they were reallly good about salmon run rewards though, so hopefully they won't mess this one up. also, the way they said "finale" in the single player trailer similarly has me worried. could be some weird translation wording, but if this is the final splatoon game i will be so sad.

guess we're just gonna have to find out
18/08/2022
i got the switch running!!! (1) (2). I'm really glad it's working again, even if it has no games (until splatoon 3 drops, that is). Well I guess there's metroid dread which i really wanna play but i don't have any money to afford that :(

in other news, i got the shrine page up and running! while it's a bit barebones right now, i'm hoping to expand the jump king one soon and add some more (panchiko, hypnospace, splatoon, and homestuck are the main contenders). the jump king page was a BITCH to get working but i'm really proud of the results.

nothing else has really happened, my life is boring
14/08/2022
Finally got this up and running. I'm bad at starting things, so I'll just get right into it:

I'm glad to finally have a long-form kind of blog thing, the shortform one kinda sucked. I probably won't be updating this one as much, because I really don't have much interesting to say, but we'll see how it goes.

I've been thinking of making some shrines, but I don't want to keep adding more stuff to procrastinate on getting the writing page actually sorted. But at the same time, I really wanna make those shrines.

This heatwave is killing me, I hate living in england.

AO3 is an awful site

13/08/2022

Hi this is all broken aaaaa help me

hi does anyone know how to get rid of all this space